My Hatred Burns with the Fire of 10,000 Suns

The Missouri Department of Revenue handles vehicle registration here in Missouri and I hate them. Yes, hate. Hate, hate, hate, hate, hate them. Before, living in California, I had always been told of horrible DMV experiences that involved waiting for hours on end. That is nothing compared with the horrors that is the Department of Revenue Licensing office here in Springfield.

Never once have been able to go there on my first try and get something done. A trip into the licensing office inevitablly results in several rounds of incomplete instructions from the clerks that lead to multiple trips around town to collect the appropriate documentation.

Yesterday was especially bad. Due to a previous frustrating day trying to register the Hyundai last year, I knew that they were going to send me to the county clerk's office for a property tax waiver/receipt. So, to streamline the process I went straight to the county clerk. I obtained said property tax waiver and left the county clerk's office feeling successful because I had only had to visit with two different offices (on two floors) in stead of four, like my last trip there.

Confidently, I drove across town to the Licensing Office with a folder full of all the documentation I needed. I had everything to transfer the car to Joe and I (as its title had previously been in my Mom's name) and to register it. I had the title signed over to Joe and I, the bill of sales stating that we had purchase the car for five dollars from my mom, the state safety inspection, proof of insurance, and I even had a sheet of paper with Joe's and my mother's social security numbers written down just in case. I felt prepared as I walked through their double doors.

After a short wait, I was called up by one of the employees. Before her I spread my paperwork proudly, anticipating a quick transaction. After mulling over my offerings she looked up at me and asked, "do you have the release of lien from the original lender?"

Crestfallen, I answered that I did not. Away I was sent to frantically search through my files for the release of lien. Miraculously, I had it, notarized as it needed to be. So, once again I made my way to the Licensing Office, more cautiously this time. After another short wait in line a different employee called me up to her window. Again, I lay all my papers out before her. This second employee looks everything over and explains that Jefferson City (the state capital) will not except the sale of a vehicle for less than $100.00. Therefore, I needed to get a gift affidavit signed by my mother.

Nearly in tears, I explained that my mother lives in California and asked how she was supposed to sign aforementioned affidavit. The answer came back, "she can fax it to you, we don't need this one notarized." Fabulous. Neither my mother nor I have a fax machine. I left the office demoralized once again.

After several phone calls to my Mom, a trip to Kinko's for her, a drive out to CSS for me, and yet another trip to the Licensing Office, the Hyundai finally got registered.

I hate them.